Unfuck yourself book summary
Unfuck yourself book summary
Chapter 1
In the beginning…
“This is a conversational slap from the universe to wake you up to your true potential, to unfuck yourself and get spectacularly into your life.”
HOW LANGUAGE CHANGES OUR LIVES
The way we talk doesn’t only affect us in the moment.
It can seep into our subconscious and become internalized,
In real everyday terms, the way we talk to ourselves and others
instantly shapes how we perceive life, and that same perception directly
impacts our behaviour right there in the moment.
If you’re sometimes talking about how “unfair” life is, you’ll start to act according to that view
The person who views success as if it were just around the corner will not only work his butt off to achieve it
but be energized and alive to it and all the while acting on that fundamental view of success.
RE-TRAIN YOUR BRAIN – ONE WORD AT A TIME
All this talk about our subconscious isn’t just a bunch of psychobabble.
Scientists have discovered that our thoughts can actually change the physical structure of our brain.
ASSERTIVE VS NARRATIVE
How the heck does one create their own reality?
Assertive self-talk is when you stake a claim for this moment of time, right here and now.
When you start to talk in terms of “I am…” or “I embrace…” or “I accept…” or “I assert…”,
all of which are powerful and commanding uses of language rather
than the narrative of “I will…” or “I’m going to…”
Chapter 2
“I am willing.”
“Stop blaming luck. Stop blaming other people.
Stop pointing to outside influences or circumstances.”
You have the life you’re willing to put up with.
Do you hate your job?
Are you in a bad relationship?
Is there something wrong with your health?
One of the beautiful things about really taking a hard look at your life and goals
is that doing so forces you to re-evaluate the path that leads to them.
PLANT YOUR FLAG
When you start to view the world through the lens of what you’re willing and unwilling to pursue,rather than what it seems you want and don’t want,
things start to become a lot clearer.
Chapter 3
“I am wired to win.”
“The truth of it is, you are winning at the life you have.”
The path you follow through life is the one dictated by your deepest, most inconspicuous thoughts.
Your brain is constantly pushing you along that path,whether it’s the one you would consciously choose to take or not.
CREATING A GAME PLAN
We are wired to win. You are wired to win.
Define your game, embrace the challenge and strive to understand yourself in deeper and more meaningful ways.
Chapter 4
“I got this.”
“Everyone has their problems, and life isn’t always perfect. It never will be.”
The thing is, the negative experiences we have rarely stay contained to that one issue.
They spread. Like a toxic chemical, they seep into all aspects of our lives.
If you’re having financial trouble, you’ll either consciously or subconsciously stress about it at dinner,which means you don’t enjoy our meal.
You start feeling on edge around family.
PUTTING PROBLEMS IN PERSPECTIVE
Remember all the problems you faced – and eventually overcame.
A lot of them may be very similar to what you’re dealing with today.
LOOKING TO THE FUTURE
In this life, you’ll sometimes have to do things you don’t want to, with people you don’t like, and in places you don’t care for.
People will leave your life as quickly and easily as they come into it. You’ll lose money,things will break, and your dog will die.
But you’ll get through it all, the good and the bad,
just like you did in the past.
You’ll stand there like the champion you are
because they’re all just yet another passing scene in the movie that is your life’s story.
A SEA OF SOMETHINGS
Face your problems as they come, one by one
Often the reason you can’t see the solution is because you’re too close to the problem.
Zoom out a little, zoom out a LOT and look at the big picture.
YOU GOT THIS
You can handle this. It’s not going to kill you. Your life isn’t over.
You’ve got plenty more left in the tank. Plenty.
Look at your track record; you’ve really got this!
You’ll make it work, just like you always have.
Chapter 5
“I embrace the uncertainty.”
“Uncertainty is where new happens.You’re an addict.
Success is never certain. It never comes without risk. When we’re no longer uncertain about success,our ambition can blunt or mellow.
CHASING WHAT DOESN’T EXIST
The funny thing is, no matter how much you chase certainty,you’ll never really be able to hold it or retain it.
STEP FORWARD AND BE JUDGED
“If you want to improve, be content to be thought foolish and stupid”You could change your life overnight if you simply abandoned the notion that other people’s opinions matter.
Life goes on, opinion heavy or opinion-lite.
EMBRACING THE UNCERTAIN
Remember, all of the successes, all of the experiences,all of the things you’ve always dreamed of are waiting for you in uncertainty.
Once you accept this, it’s not as scary as before.
OPPORTUNITY HUNTING
When you stop searching for certainty,
when you quit trying to make sense of everything,a lot of your stress will simply melt away
Life is an adventure. It’s absolutely filled with opportunity
“I embrace the uncertainty.” This one simple statement can completely change the way you live, moment to moment to moment.
The only thing that’s guaranteed in life is that it’s uncertain.
The only thing we know is that we know nothing.
Chapter 6
“I am not my thoughts; I am what I do.”
“You are not defined by what’s inside your head.You are what you do. Your actions.”
YOU ARE NOT YOUR THOUGHTS
No matter how hard you try, you’re going to have the occasional negative thought.Maybe more than occasionally.Maybe every day.Maybe hundreds of times per day.
You change your life by doing, not by thinking about doing.
HOW DOING CHANGES YOUR THINKING
Doing gets you doing what you need to do, of course.But it is, ironically, also the quickest way to change your thoughts.When you can focus your attention on the action at hand,eventually your consciousness starts to get the idea
ACTION GREASES THE WHEEL OF LIFE
“Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage.
If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it.
Go out and get busy”
Act on the moment and in line with what the item in front of your face demands of you.
Fuck how you feel, ACT! Change your life by changing your actions.That’s the only way.
Chapter 7
“I am relentless.”
“Our biggest successes are born out of discomfort, uncertainty, and risk.”
IT’S ONLY TRUE IF YOU AGREE
The only question is whether you agree with what you can and cannot do.An opinion only becomes true when you accept it and stop acting on your potential.
BLAZING THE RELENTLESS TRAIL
“I expect nothing and accept everything.”
EXPECTING THE UNEXPECTED
Your powerlessness is directly correlated to the gap
between your hidden expectations and your reality.
The greater the gap, the worse you’ll actually feel
CUTTING OUT THE MIDDLE MAN OF EXPECTATION
many of the difficulties and complications in your life are
the direct result of expectations that you have or have had
Our minds would love to predict and plan
for everything that’s going to happen.
But it’s simply not possible.
And these expectations not only have
a negative effect on our emotional state,
they actually leave us less powerful than we really could be.
It’s so much more effective to simply take things as
they present themselves, to live in the moment
(like there’s another moment you could live in), and
solve issues and items as they arise, than to constantly expect.
LIFE IS MORE OF A DANCE THAN A MARCH
We value the notion that we freely choose what we do, and when to do it.
We want to feel that we control our own fate and shape our own destiny.
do we really have free will? Many would argue that we don’t.
WHEN LIFE IS APPROPRIATE
When you expect nothing, you’re living in the moment.
You’re not worrying about the future or rejecting the past.
The next time you catch yourself getting brought down by your expectations,
shift things in a different direction.
Instead of getting your knickers in a twist about how
things didn’t turn out the way you wanted or expected them to,
simply accept them for what they are. In that moment
you are now freed up to deal with them.
EXPECT NOTHING, ACCEPT EVERYTHING
When you are free from its expectations
you are “in a dance” with life where you
can simply execute the plan, and deal with what happens.
If it succeeds, you can celebrate. If it fails, you can re-calibrate.
Chapter 9
Where Next?
In order to improve your internal world, you have to
start by taking action in the external world.
YOU’RE GOING TO DIE
Future you is not going to regret a lack of achievement or
the absence of any one thing in your life.
The only thing you will regret is not trying.
Not striving.
Not pushing through when the going got tough.
You won’t regret not making a million dollars,
you’ll regret never starting that business or quitting that lousy job.
STOP BUYING YOURSELF OFF
successful people don’t wait. They’re not waiting for the “right” moment.
They don’t wait for inspiration to strike or for
some cosmic event to force them to action.
They get up and they do, and they try, and they fail even before they may feel “ready.”
STOP BLAMING YOUR PAST
People become trapped in their past, trapped in their childhood.
If you want a new job, go out and apply for one
You are what you do, not what you say you’ll do Stopping your bad habit doesn’t help,unless you replace it with something else,something that actually works in your favor and is an example of the new kind of life you really want to live.
It’s about systematically replacing the old with the new,forging a new life for yourself–the kind of life you’ve always wanted.
GET OUT OF YOUR HEAD
“I am relentless” doesn’t mean relentlessly thinking or watching TV.It means relentlessly doing.Relentlessly taking action, pursuing your goals,acting and failing and ultimately succeeding
This isn’t just about seizing the day,this is about seizing the moment, the hour, the week, the month.This is about seizing your fucking life and staking a claim for yourself as though your life depended on it